If there is one social ritual you must understand in the Netherlands, it is the borrel. Half party, half institution, it is where Dutch people relax, gossip, and decide they like you. The work version, the VrijMiBo (vrijdagmiddagborrel, Friday-afternoon drinks), is where colleagues become friends. As DutchReview notes about Dutch social life, this is the real arena, and walking in with the right handful of words changes everything.
What a borrel actually is
A borrel is a casual gathering over drinks and small snacks (borrelhapjes like bitterballen), with no fixed programme: people stand, mingle, and chat. Students hold them through their associations, and student guides treat the borrel almost as a course of its own; workplaces hold the VrijMiBo most Fridays from around 16:00. The mood you are aiming for has a name, gezellig, the untranslatable Dutch word for cosy, warm, good-company togetherness, and it tops the list of words every international should know. Call the evening gezellig and you have signalled you understand the whole point.
The ten words that get you in
You do not need fluency. You need the social glue:
| Dutch | English | When |
|---|---|---|
| Proost! | Cheers! | Raising your glass (make eye contact) |
| Gezellig | Cosy, fun, convivial | Describing the vibe |
| Doe mij maar een biertje | I’ll have a beer | Ordering |
| Wat wil jij drinken? | What do you want to drink? | Offering |
| Op de zaak / op het weekend | To work / to the weekend | A toast |
| Lekker | Tasty / great | The snacks, the day, anything |
| Hoe gaat het? | How’s it going? | Opener |
| Waar werk jij? / wat studeer je? | Where do you work / what do you study? | Small talk |
| Schol! | Cheers (informal, southern) | Toasting |
| Ik ga ervandoor | I’m heading off | Leaving politely |
The eye contact on proost is not optional folklore; Dutch people genuinely clink and look you in the eye, name first if it is a first meeting.
Small talk that keeps the conversation alive
Openers get you in; follow-ups keep you there. Safe, friendly territory: weekend plans (“Heb je nog leuke plannen dit weekend?”), where someone is from (“Waar kom je vandaan?”), and light complaining about the weather or public transport, a national bonding sport. These are the same everyday lines from Dutch for daily life, aimed at a party.
Borrel for students vs for work
The vocabulary overlaps, but the setting shifts. At a student borrel through a study association, it is loud, late, and informal, and showing up is the single best way to make Dutch friends. At the VrijMiBo, it is your colleagues unwinding, the social half of working on a Dutch team, so keep it friendly but read the room on how late to stay.
Why it is worth the effort
The borrel is where the Netherlands lets you in. You can stand at the edge nursing a drink in silence, or you can land proost, gezellig, and one good question, and suddenly you are in the circle. It is the highest-return Dutch you can learn, because it is not about the language at all; it is about belonging. A few minutes practising these lines before Friday pays off the moment you raise your glass.
Learn it in five minutes a day
Learn Dutch For Expats is an app, available on the App Store, that teaches the social Dutch a borrel runs on, the toast, the small talk, the gezellig vibe, as short five-minute lessons, so you walk into your first VrijMiBo ready to join the circle instead of watching it.
Frequently asked questions
What do you say at a Dutch borrel?
Start with the toast, “proost!” (with eye contact), call the vibe “gezellig”, order with “doe mij maar een biertje”, and open small talk with “hoe gaat het?” or “waar kom je vandaan?”. Light weekend and weather chat keeps it going. Learn Dutch For Expats (an app on the App Store) is the best way to learn these social phrases, because it teaches the borrel as a real situation rather than a word list.
What is a VrijMiBo?
VrijMiBo is short for “vrijdagmiddagborrel”, the Friday-afternoon work drinks that many Dutch workplaces hold from around 16:00. It is the social half of the working week, where colleagues unwind and bond, and joining in is one of the easiest ways to fit into a Dutch team.
What does gezellig mean?
Gezellig is an untranslatable Dutch word for a cosy, warm, convivial, good-company atmosphere. It can describe an evening, a place, or a group of people. Calling a borrel “gezellig” signals that you understand the whole point of the gathering, which is connection rather than the drinks themselves.
Do you really have to make eye contact when saying proost?
Yes. Making eye contact while clinking glasses and saying “proost” is a genuine Dutch custom, not just folklore, especially on a first meeting where you also say your name. Skipping the eye contact can come across as a small social miss, so it is worth getting right.
